Monday, February 14, 2011

Life is More Than a Box of Chocolates

So, another Valentine's Day...

I am quite happy to have many people with whom I share the sentiment of the day. And for those who abhor this day? Please don't let a
day make you feel less special than you are.

And now for something totally different.

I'm a pastor. 99.9% of the time I love it. I loved it yesterday. I lead two worship services each Sunday, and after a particularly normal first service, I was feeling a bit down. As I walked into the sanctuary of Church Number 2, I saw a lovely box of chocolates neatly placed in my chair behind the pulpit. I knew immediately who the chocolates were from. Last year I got a dozen roses from this same person.

Here comes the dilemma.

So, I have decided to start (again) taking seriously this business of eating better and making my body fit for life. Seems easy, right? I am a week in, after I had a few successes and many, many failures. But I live one day at a time, choosing water over sugary soda and veggies (which I truly love) over chocolate.

So these chocolates from church posed a problem. I lived through a minor "encounter" during worship, and felt good when I got home. My husband and I swapped some Valentine's Day trinkets, and life was good! So I had one chocolate! Look at my self control! And then Monday came...

I made good choices. I ate one more chocolate. Self control win! I went out to lunch with a few friends, at a Chinese Buffet even, and made good choices! LOOK AT ME! I am being successful! And on the drive home, my phone shouted at me, "IT'S SO FLUFFY I'M GONNA DIE!!" (that's the ringtone I have set for email notifications.) So I get home, open the email, and it is a passive aggressive email from the same instigator of the "encounter" during worship yesterday!

Ugh... I am angry. I am disappointed. I am feeling attacked. I cry. I want chocolate. Perhaps it is because the chocolate is sitting on the coffee table. So I moved the chocolate to the kitchen table. Out of sight, out of mind, right? So I vent to a friend about how angry I am, I do some housework (that in itself should tell you how angry I am), and I try to take my mind off of eating

But when I sat down and needed to get work done on the computer, I ate one caramel. I typed. I ate another caramel. I typed. And before I knew it, I had devoured every caramel in the box. And then I picked up a strawberry candy! I DON'T EVEN LIKE THEM. What is it about anger that can make an otherwise strong willed person eat a bunch of chocolates I don't even care for?

So I walked outside, dumped the box of chocolates in the dumpster, and said to myself, "Anna, life is more than a box of chocolates."

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